YSaturday, November 25, 2006
let me start with some of the things that matters..heh.
been hospitalized for fuggin 10days and everyday is filled wit tears and injections and antibiotics and docs and nurses and sick people. i HATED it.
BUT i love the ppl who came to visit like everyday..beloved family..buddies..and those i never expected to come like twice or more, (samir and his loved frens..=) and sue, syl, shi) love u guys. hehe.
and i can NEVER forget my beloved cuzzies for their support in goin thru that f-ed phase wit me.
i thank God for keepin me up and running..hehe.Peace.
the past 2weeks have been a huge rollercoaster ride fer me. from hi fever and migraines to brain infection to meningitis to taking out of my effin brain juice wic terribly hurt to cryin in tears cuz im afraid of bein paralysed.heh.
sum it all up=emy's weak.
got discharged and slogged at home then came my buddies wit our usual late nites and then amidst all tis, suddenly came loneliness and emptiness.
a friend of mine got me thinking..
wonder y we keep doin things for the good of the person we truly love just to hurt ourselves in the end?
i went thru this phase once and it sucks to have to go thru it again. mebe this is just how its gona end. there really aint no such thing as a happy ending.
not that i've stopped hoping.heh.
the one thing that im constantly worried abt is school. im nowhere near passing anything.
been sooooo far behind lessons and i duno wat to do to catch up.
wat shud i do???
i need motivation cuz im so bleargh now.
i wake up evry mornin feelin hopeless and dead. im a walkin morbid whose life revolve around hope, entirely. i HOPE i can pass, i HOPE i can be happy, i HOPE i can have a life, i HOPE i can make it, i HOPE hope hope hope..
after all the things said and done..i wonder,
wat is it that i've ranted out?? and do u get my point or wat im feelin rite now?
thought so.
_callous_ was here with you at
